Whenever a person I care about dies, I think about that book The Tenth Good Thing About Barney. it is a story of a child who has to.find ten good things to say at the funeral of his cat. When someone I love dies, I immediately start thinking of their ten good things. It is a ritual I do and it helps me get through those first few hours. We lost a young family friend recently.

1. Chelsea was funny. She didn’t always mean to be funny and sometimes it was meant for shock value, but Chelsea could always make me laugh.
2. She was a great reader and we often talked about our love of books.
3. She was a good guest. I did have to stay up with her long after my daughter fell asleep at sleepovers, but sleep was never my thing. It was good training for my non sleeping god daughter.
4. She was kind. I never heard her speak badly about anyone. 
5. She was quirky, different and had such an interesting view of the world. I’m always attracted to people like that. 
6. She was always ready to try any new treatment to get some relief from her challenges. 
7. We both liked theatre, museums and trying new restaurants. One time I took her out to dinner when she was a freshman in college. She acted like she hadn’t had a meal since she got there and I was a foodie. We ordered five main courses and finished them!!!!!!!
8. Chelsea was very intelligent, creative and fun. 
9. She always looked perfect but was ready to get down and dirty when it was play time. 
10. Like the kid in the book, I could only come up with nine things that I wanted to share. I guess the tenth would be that she fought an epic battle against a mind that was filled with depression. 

Your kids are not supposed to die. It goes against the rules of nature. It isn’t supposed to happen but it does and it’s hard.

Fly safe Chelsea,

JAZ