Foods Not To Eat In Public

Foods Not To Eat In Public

“People who love to eat are always the best people.” Julia Child

Imagine your fingers dripping in sauce, your mouth opening extra wide to swallow some big bite of something before it falls on the floor, your teeth covered in bits of green and yellow, and you will know what others see when you eat these foods.

This list can also be used for foods not to eat with braces or foods not to eat on a date.

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Corn On The Cob. Avoid food that requires you to slide your face across a buttered surface and is guaranteed to lodge kernels so deep in your teeth that even power tools won’t help you.

There is no neat way to eat a taco.

Ribs. Barbecue sauce is the most delicious thing ever. it is just not attractive on your face, your hands, in your nails, and on your hair which is where it will probably be. Any food that comes with a moist towelette should not be eaten where people have to watch.

Ramen. While slurping soup is considered good manners in some countries, it is not done in the USA where I live.  You will have to either slurp or bite the noodles and watch the rest fall out of your mouth.

Lobster or crab. Any food that comes with more than one type of utensil and a bib is a guaranteed disaster. Does anyone really want to see you tearing apart a sea creature with your bare hands?

Cooked spinach. No matter how neat or cool you think you are, every time you eat cooked spinach it will always get all over your teeth. If you must eat it in public, try the raw.

Burgers with everything / meatball heroes. Avoid any sandwich with meat, cheese and sauce oozing out of it. No one wants to watch you eat food that requires thousands of napkins.

Powdered donuts. It is a lose – lose situation. Nothing with ruin your outfit or make you look more like a crackhead than white powdered sugar.

Messy foods are best eaten with close friends and loved ones only. We started life as messy eaters and we may end up that way.  In the time between, have fun with messy foods because they bring us together with fun nights, relaxed expectations and much laughter.

Fly safe,
JAZ

13 thoughts on “Foods Not To Eat In Public

  1. Add truly fresh croissants in Paris. For an American your table will always end up looking as if it’s been hit by a sandstorm.

  2. Ha ha, Jayne. I don’t eat donuts and burgers, but I’ll eat any of the other foods anywhere, any time, in front of anyone. Let them see a real woman enjoying herself. And I’ve felt like this all my life.

  3. Not to forget New Orleans po-boys dripping with gravy and Dalmatian black risotto made with octopus ink which will make your mouth look like a black hole.

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