Signs That You Are Still A Tourist In LA

Los Angeles was the kind of place where everybody was from somewhere else and nobody really dropped anchor. It was a transient place. People drawn by the dream, people running from the nightmare. Twelve million people and all of them ready to make a break for it if necessary. Figuratively, literally, metaphorically — any way you want to look at it — everybody in L.A. keeps a bag packed. Just in case.” Michael Connelly

You honk your horn in traffic.

You shop at the mall on Hollywood and Highland.

You are at the Fairfax Farmers Market on a weekday morning – hopefully not wearing cargo shorts and a fanny pack.

You haven’t worn jeans to a nice restaurant or the theatre yet. You haven’t been to the theatre in LA yet.

You still dress seasonally – wool in winter, white in summer.  You haven’t figured out that its scarves, boots, flip-flops and tank tops all year round.

You haven’t been downtown or to a museum that isn’t the Getty .

You are still having lunch at the Ivy for celeb sightings. The food is not as good as it used to be. You get excited when you see Richard Dreyfus at the drug store, Meg Ryan at Barneys or Madonna at Kabbalah. i have to admit I was happy when I saw Elton John having lunch with the kids.

You get excited when you see Tyra Banks online for the bathroom at the Arclight. You do go to the Arclight and not the “Graumans” Chinese  theatre right?

You don’t have a favorite Mexican restaurant.

Everyone knows the driving shortcut you have just found.

You rarely use valet parking and prefer to find a spot on the street.

You have not yet been on a juice fast.

You are not worried by the lack of rain.

Words like Santa Anas, fire season, earthquake kits and did any one feel that? are not part of your regular vocabulary yet.

You leave your car on South Beverly Drive and walk to Rodeo Drive. You still leave your car in one place and walk to all your errands if you can. You attempt to live somewhere where you are near public transportation.

You have not perfected your spray tan color yet.

You have barbecues in the winter. You still get a bit sad that there is no snow on Christmas.

You have not bought a winter coat even though there are days you need it.

You still prefer to eat in the restaurants that have a view of the ocean even though others are better and less expensive.

Fly Safe,

JAZ